Tuesday, June 28, 2011

It's interesting the way things work out sometimes. The people you don't like suddenly become your friends, and your friends become strangers. Sometimes you have
to learn to let go and allow these changes to happen. Who knows, you might become the person you never thought you could.

And maybe a happy ending doesn't include a guy, maybe it's you, on your own, picking up the pieces and starting over, freeing yourself up for something better in the future. Maybe the happy ending is just moving on. Or maybe the happy ending is this: knowing after all the unreturned phone calls, broken hearts, through the blunders and misread signals, through all the pain and embarrassment, you never gave up hope.

sometimes there is nothing to be said. sometimes nothing should be said. i just want to find someone who won't run away. someone to look me in the eyes & tell me it's okay that things don't always go right. that this is how life works, & how it will always work. that it's not going to be easy. today, tomorrow, the next day, but it will somehow get better.

Listen bud, she's over you. She may have learned the hard way, but at least she's learned. She's not tangled in those strings anymore. You no longer control her emotions. She's free, and we'd all like to thank you for that.

and even if we never talk again, please remember that i'm forever changed by who you are and what you meant to me.

And at this point, I'd just settle for friendship. Or maybe a single hello, one of the ten times we pass each other during the day. It's like you don't know me.

I’ve learned this past year. I’ve changed, I’ve grown and maybe things do happen for a reason. Maybe they don’t. But no matter what, they still happen. That’s what we need to remember. I learned to stop analyzing things, to just let them happen. And if I get hurt, or if something bad happens, there’s nothing I can do to change that. I’ve learned to go with my gut, and that it’s okay to make mistakes because the ones that matter won’t care. I’ve learned that love really is as great as they say it is. I’ve learned that your friends can save you from your worst enemy: yourself. And most importantly, I’ve learned that today is all we have.

I am made of one hundred percent flaws, and I can promise there is not one ounce of perfection in me. But, good intentions hold me together, and I hope that counts for something.

It's taken me awhile, but i'm learning that letting go of the past is a good thing. It doesn't mean forgetting, it just means moving on and you can't enjoy the present when you're stuck in the past

Truth is, sometimes you scare the shit out of me. You make me feel as if I'm not alone. Yet, I know any minute you have the ability to rip that feeling from me. Truth is, I love you, and that in itself, is scary enough.

You know those nights where you just stay up all night? Doing whatever it takes to not fall asleep on someone, because you just want to keep on talking to them. Even if it gets real late, you don’t even mind it one bit. ‘Cause you think to yourself, it’s all worth it.

I’m the kind of girl who is quiet in large groups or around people I don’t know; you only see the real me if we’re close. I smile and laugh a lot, especially at the most inappropriate times. I’m a hopeless romantic. I trip over air, up stairs, and over people’s feet. I am the hardest person to offend, but it is all too easy to make me feel horrible. I hate telling people about my problems; they don’t need to worry about me. I’m the one who listens to other people’s problems. I believe people should not be judged before one takes the time to get to know them, yet I am guilty of doing that exact thing. I love to think rather than talk. I’m awkward, clumsy, shy, strange… but this is me. Take it or leave it.

In summer life is different. Time doesn't move hour to hour; but from mood to moment.
We live by the currents, plan by the tides, and follow the sun.

I only have two words for you: I'm done. After everything I've done for you, every chance that I gave you, and yet you still break my heart. But it's over now. Finally, I've realized that I don't deserve this and honestly, you don't deserve me. Yeah, I still love you and I probably will for a long time, but I can't stay here anymore. It hurts too much. I guess this is moving on.


Monday, June 27, 2011

People are fragile things you should know by now
Be careful what you put them through.

“Believe me; everyone who tried to save him that day isn’t going to forget. It’s the day they failed. They’ll ask themselves what they could’ve done. Could they have gotten there sooner? They’ll heal, but it’s going to take time. They’ll move on, but they won’t forget.

"It’s just unfair that she’s gone. It’s like, if we can’t keep each other safe, then why are we even doing any of this? Sometimes, I think maybe, maybe he was right, you know? Maybe — maybe it’s just not worth it."

"Here's what's not beautiful about it: from here, you can't see the rust or the cracked paint or whatever, but you can tell what the place really is. You can see how fake it all is. It's not even hard enough to be made out of plastic. It's a paper town. I mean, look at it, Q: look at all those culs-de-sac, those streets that turn in on themselves, all the houses that were built to fall apart. All those paper people living in their paper houses, burning the future to stay warm. All the paper kids drinking beer some bum bought for them at the paper convenience store. Everyone demented with the mania of owning things. All the things paper-thin and paper-frail. And all the people, too. I've lived here for eighteen years and I have never once in my life come across anyone who cares about anything that matters."

"Tomorrow, you promise yourself, will be different, yet, tomorrow is too often a repetition of today."


"What is an "instant" death anyway? How long is an instant? Is it one second? Ten? The pain of those seconds must have been awful as her heart burst and her lungs collapsed and there was no air and no blood to her brain and only raw panic. What the hell is instant? Nothing is instant. Instant rice takes five minutes, instant pudding an hour. I doubt that an instant of blinding pain feels particularly instantaneous." 



"We all wear masks and the time comes when we cannot remove them without removing our own skin."




Thursday, June 9, 2011

monster.

I did it because I wanted to, because I needed to, because I had to, but mainly because you said I couldn't.

she's one of those girls who doesn't quite know what she's doing, but wants to know everything will be worth it one day. she isn't amazing at one thing, she's just good at a lot of things and that's all she'll ever be. she wishes she could be different, but she still lives her life to the fullest anyways. all she truly needs is love to keep her sane. she looks at her world like it's all a book, with pages being read everyday. she's her own worst enemy and hardest critic, she knows she has flaws and tries to accept them, even though she knows she never fully will. but more than anything, she just wants to make a difference one day. and she wants someone to remember her name.

Your right. I've never had a bad break up. I've never had my heart broken into a million pieces. I have no right to put up these walls, right? But I have seen my friends cry for months over boys who they gave their hearts to. I've seen boys promise 'forever' only to watch forever end a few months later, when they find someone better to sleep with. I've stayed up countless nights, not by choice, but because my parents were fighting so loud that I couldn't fall asleep. I've been the shoulder to cry on. I've seen the strongest people in the world become weak for love. And I refuse to be that girl. I will never fall in love.

You know what your problem is? You get attached, fast. And once you're attached to someone, you do everything you can to please them and make them happy. It's never been about what you want, it's always everyone's needs before your own. You give out too many chances to people, who quite frankly, do not deserve them. They take advantage of you, and you become a pushover. But you're okay with that, because they're in your life and that's all you ever really wanted. And even if they screw you over, you'll still be there for them. Because that's you, that who you are. Once you get attached to someone, they capture your heart and they always have a place there. And that is why it's so hard for you to let him go.

I don't know why we all hang on to something we know we're better of letting go. It's like we're scared to lose what we don't really have. Some of us say we'd rather have that then nothing at all, but the truth is; to have it half way is harder then not having it all.

I know what it's like to be so mad, you go into this blind rage and don't even remember what you said or did. I know what it's like to be so heartbroken, you can't even look at yourself in the mirror without bursting into tears. I know what it's like to have so many bad things happen to you,you start to lose faith in everything. However, I also know times of pure joy and happiness. And if I can just keep my mind set on those, I know I'll make it through all of the hard times. And maybe, just maybe, I'll be able to find the faith I thought I had lost forever.

Part of me just wants to find the right words to hurt you the same way you hurt me

Don’t say that it didn't mean anything or it was not worth it. if you’ve thought about her everyday or if you memorized her laugh, then at one point, she must have meant something to you.

People add a quote to their favorites because at one time in their life, that quote described, perfectly what they felt, believed or loved and they, themselves, couldn't put into words.

Open your eyes girls, we're young. we don't need a boy to love, hold, and kiss. We won't always be able to relax and be kids, but we'll always be able to love. So I'm gonna get out there and liven up this world, leave my mark, and make a difference. Because in five years we will want to rewind, but we can't. So stop worrying about that boy, now is the time of our lives. Lets make mistakes and not care and make memories that will never fade. Live it up, and live it crazy. We are only young once, so lets screw this up right. Drop the drama, screw the calories, and never question your actions. See you later boy, I have history to make.

 
We just have to accept that people are going to stay in our hearts even when they dont always stay in our lives

She’s the girl that believes that what comes around goes around. The one that hopes for a better day. The one that won’t give up on you. She’s the girl that’s unlike the rest. The one that spent her days smiling, and her nights crying. She’s the girl that would love to be loved. The one that looks so damn strong, but feels so weak. She’s the girl that picks herself up every time she falls

You know what the best feeling in the world is? The feeling that nothing can touch you. The feeling that you are going to be okay forever and for always. The feeling that everything is going to stay just how it is; the feeling of being overly and excessively happy. The times when you’re gasping for air from laughing, or nearly in pain from smiling so much. When you’re with your friends and you know this is how it’s supposed to be. I love those times, and I love that feeling. I want to bottle it up and have it always, because I think that’s what life is about. Forgetting the bad and getting lost in the good

Don't re-think things. Because usually, your first thought is what you really want to do, so just follow it through.


Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Children of the Dark.

Be crazy. Be wild. Be free.



Yes I am a girl. Yes, I do eat McDonalds, donuts, chips, chocolate and ice cream and no do i work out. And I'm proud of my body.



You want the truth? Well, here it is. Eventually, you forget it all. First, you forget everything you learned - the dates of wars and Pythagorean theorem. You especially forget everything you didn't really learn, but just memorized the night before. You forget the names of all but one or two of your favorite teachers; and eventually you forget those, too. You forget your junior year class schedule and where you used to sit, and your best friend's home phone number and the lyrics to that song you must have played a million times. And eventually, but slowly, you forget your humiliations - even the ones that seemed indelible just fade away. You forget who was cool and who was not, who was pretty, smart, athletic, and not. Who went to a good college, who threw the best parties, who had the most friends - you forget all of them. Even the ones you said you loved, and the ones you actually did. They're the last to go. And once you've forgotten enough, you love someone else.



I believe in love. i believe in faith. i believe in doing what’s right. i believe in music, art, and dance. i believe in standing up for what you believe in. i believe in respect. i believe in liberal views. i believe in conservative views. i believe in makeup. i believe in red lipstick, dramatic eyes, and smooth skin. i believe in sleeping in. i believe in summer evenings. i believe in reading. i believe in writing. i believe in laughing. i believe in crying. i believe in making wishes on shooting stars, 11:11, and dandelions. i believe in prudents adventures and dangerous endeavors. i believe in tattoos. i believe in piercings. i believe in self expression. i believe in divorce. i believe in marriage. i believe in commitment. i believe in wanderlust. i believe in nail polish, trashy TV, and catchy pop songs. i believe in social networking. i believe in pain. i believe in joy.
and most of all, i believe in humanity.




i dont know why i did the things i did, i dont know why i said the things i said.



m not mad because you lied. im not mad because you cheated. im mad because you didnt have the balls to tell me that you lost feelings for me, if you had any in the first place.



dont look up, just let them think that there's no place else youd rather be.



women are getting more and more degrated today. i know sometimes its just a joke, but i do take it personally being a woman myself. its time i get some respect, or im leaving.



to strong to tell you i am sorry, to proud to tell you i was wrong.


the fact is, life gets tough. shit happens, people die, tragedies occur. life happens. remember, youre beautiful and you will get through it. i did.



I believe in karma, what you give is what you get returned. I believe you can’t appreciate real love until you’ve been burned. I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side. I believe you don’t know what you’ve got until you say goodbye. ♥



Strange how someone you once loved can become just another person you once knew. Under broken frames & years of dust, I fear all that’s left of us are sepia smiles & faded blue. But I’ll pick them up & blow them off & think but never tell. ‘Cause that’s just what you’ve done to me & maybe it’s sad or maybe it’s just as well. ♥



Growing up is never easy. You hold on to things that were. You wonder what’s to come. But that night, I think we knew it was time to let go of what had been, & look ahead to what would be. Other days. New days. Days to come. The thing is, we didn’t have to hate each other for getting older. We just had to forgive ourselves for growing up.



I can’t say im proud of my life, but i can say im proud that ive learned. ive learned that i can’t rely on everyone, but i can’t expect everyone to hurt me. i know some things don’t work out, but i know everything that has has been for the better. i can’t guarantee ill be able to walk around with a smile, but i know where ive been. im not one to complain so ill keep trying & in the end, ill know i did my best ♥



think we spend too much time wondering why we’re not good enough. we waste too much time putting ourselves down that we don’t ever stop to see that we are good enough. we spend too much time with our heads down and hearts closed and never get a chance to look up from the ground and see that the sun is shining and tomorrow is another day ♥



Don’t think you’re some perfect princess, because you’re not. Don’t go tell your ex that he missed out on his biggest oppurtunity. He didn’t. He left you because he didn’t think you were the best one for him. Which means he just did YOU a favor. He just did you one because now you know there’s someone better than him. So don’t go saying, “You lost your chance, now I’m gonna go find someone better.” Because you should be saying, “Thanks for putting up with me, now I know there’s someone better, someone meant for me.”



So I say a thousand stupid things. And half the time I never mean them. But this time I'm serious. I'm never going to talk to you first. So if I mean anything to you at all, than you can talk to me, because I give up. I'm done.♥